The Timid Light

Did it ever come a time in your life that you wished you were influential; someone who could convince people to believe what you believe in?

Maybe you might imagine then yourself wearing a first class suit or someone who confidently walks in 5-inch heels. Or maybe you imagine yourself to be someone who can boss around, speak convincing words and talk different languages. Or someone who excels in arts and music, and even without saying a single word, you are able to influence people.

Whether you are an extrovert or an introvert, I know you have already been at a moment in your life where you wish you are that much powerful to convince people to make your beliefs theirs and do the things you do.

I used to believe that if I have the guts, an influential family background and some money to help me out do what I want to do, maybe I can change the world. Maybe, I can help the world know about Jesus Christ. timid light

But I am not that much confident. I hide behind my blog. I hide behind my skills in writing. I hide behind these words. And confidence is just a language I only speak towards people I dearly know.

I am not from a very influential family either. My grandparents lived all their lives around a far-flung community. My Dad loves farming more than living in a crowded city. Having a very private life has always been the trend in my genealogy, and climbing the heights of fame and influence was never our aim.

I flooded myself of thoughts that I will never touch a life out there. I may have smiled at a stranger once, but I’m sure it is not enough to show the love of Jesus Christ. I’m still someone you may have sat beside on a bus ride but chose to look at the views outside than look at you and have some small talk along the way.

So, questions to myself still go on. I’m still writing on my unending list of ‘what-ifs’. How can I ever influence people? How can I show them Jesus Christ if this is how I live my life?

Then just this day, my Aunt talked to me about how much I’ve influenced my cousin’s life.

Of course, I was shocked and even asked myself if I am really capable of showing that to her. For me, it’s was effortless. I’ve never even had a desire to influence her. Never even pour a cup of effort to convince a 9-year old kid.

Looking back a year ago, I remember reading some Bible stories to her and her siblings before going to sleep. I can still remember how she got teary-eyed over the story of how Jesus Christ died on the Cross. She kept asking why it has to be like that, why He has to do that. With little sobs, she kept on telling me we do not deserve it. And her unending questions followed me as weeks went by. So I earnestly answered her, showing her that the answers are all in the Bible.

I even remember one time, she saw me reading a Bible. She went to get one and then sat in front of me. She saw me highlighting some sentences so she rushed to get her highlighter too. I felt she was having trouble understanding it because she’s reading a King James Version. So, I helped her go through using my Bible’s version.

For me, it was just some bonding time, and not even my definition of influencing people. It was more of helping than trying to change someone.

But when my Aunt said these words;

“If there was a legacy you were able to leave her, it’s your habit of reading the Bible.”

My heart melted not in a way that stirs up pride, but in a way that humbles me down.

You see, we sometimes think that God can only use powerful people to influence some lives. We have dreams of becoming like someone who is ahead of us in this race;

In fact, I dream of becoming the writer version of Charles Spurgeon who puts his confidence in Christ when telling people about God’s grace. I dream of growing old faithfully like John MacArthur who lives his life dwelling in the riches of God and sharing the wisdom God has given him. I dream of becoming like Stephen who may had only one chapter in the Bible, but taught me how to be confident in telling people about Jesus Christ even if it means I have to die in the end.

I dream of telling the people around me about Jesus Christ, but I was so focused on doing it on a bigger arena without realizing that I can be a help even in only one soul.

But I realize now that influencing people to believe on what we believe should not be the core of our worship to God. It should root in glorifying Him alone even if it means we can never stand and speak in front of a mega church.

Convincing people is not even our work. Only the Holy Spirit who dwells in us can do that.

Is God glorified in every action you do? Does it reflect a life that is already surrendered to Jesus Christ? Can it bless other people or just make the Holy Spirit groan?

Being in Christ, holiness should already be our desire. It’s not a desire that pushes morality alone without a love in glorifying Him.

And from that desire of glorifying God in everything, a light will spring up –a light that speaks of His goodness and greatness, a light that never desires to influence someone but it did, and a light that shows no effort of showing off, but through its humility, it touched someone’s life beyond what humans can ever imagine.

Maybe you are just like me –someone who hides behind words I can never express in public but words that dwell richly in my heart; a painting that hangs silently in the corner with no desire of showing off but was able to catch someone’s attention; a wild flower in a peony field; a firefly in a place of bees; a lampstand in a city of lights. Fear sometimes swallows me and confidence is not my closest neighbor, but God made me realize today that I don’t have to aim to be someone else. I can be who I am now and still be His workmanship. I can be small yet have a big heart. I can be silent but still speak loudly through my actions.

Because it doesn’t matter how big and influential you are, what matters most is what is in your heart.

A heart that is focused in glorifying God doesn’t focus on the number of lives that it was able to influence. It is focused in God and God alone; without thinking of numbers, greatness, money and fame.

Aim that kind of heart, and your joys will surely be beyond what you can ever imagine.

God bless you.

All glory belongs to God alone.

 

In Christ,

KrizSummer

 

You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. -Matthew 5:14-16

 

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30 Comments Add yours

  1. My dear sweet friend Kriz,
    Your post has been colored my evening and touched my heart so deeply. God can and will use everyone in this world to use His mightiness to the world no matter who they are. No matter how powerful we are to influence others. Your personal story has been proves it 🙂 Awesome thought of you,Kriz. Many love and blessings to you.

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello Karina! 🙂 Thank you for your very kind and uplifting comment. 🙂 It’s my joy to share for God’s glory. God bless you, Karina. 🙂

  2. Reblogged this on Karina's Thought and commented:
    We often do not feel worthy or doesn’t have a good ability to tell about God to the world, oftentimes we become a timid to show the God mightiness to other. This post tells and shows us that God can and will use everyone to shows His greatness. No matter how powerful we are to give influence to others, No matter how voluble we speak. God will never look it at all. God can choose and use us no matter whom and how we are. Thing to ponder: With all our weaknesses, are we ready to use by God to spreading God’s word to other?

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Thank you so much for reblogging it, Karina. 🙂 Greatly appreciated. God bless you always. 🙂

      1. 🙂 you are welcome. Your post is so worth for others. You share one of the important message here. Blessings to you my sweet friend 🙂

  3. paulfg says:

    1) Karina – thank you for sharing these beautiful words
    2) Kriz – thank you for writing and sharing these beautiful words

    “I can be small yet have a big heart. I can be silent but still speak loudly through my actions.”

    And He brings another wondrous connection! Another pebble plopped in the still pool. Another ripple. Always ripples that change. His ripples. Thank you.

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello Paul. 🙂 Thank you for having some time to read and comment on this post. Glory to God alone. God bless you always. 🙂

  4. rolerrol says:

    Hey Kriz….How you???

    I really really enjoyed your post!!! You highlighted some really important things. Your story about being an influence to your cousin really inspired me…….I have that mistake at times thinking it’s doing the big things that matter but it’s not just the big things only. I was dscouraged this week because I thought I was not doing enough for God. I was doing the ‘big’ things for God but your post really helped me!

    And let me say this concerning you…
    You may see all these things that are wrong with you in context of making a difference but God has great plans for you. God can only be glorified in someone who acknowledges their weaknesses but at the same time relies and depends on Him. Because you have seen your short comings but realise it’s God that does the work He will use you! You may see yourself as hiding behind a lot of things but God is preparing you to be significant!!
    I really believe He has amazing things in store for you. You are going to touch a lot of people. Stay humble and continue to trust in Him! God bless you Kriz…..

    This was a great post!

    Rolain

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello Rolain! 🙂 By God’s grace, I am doing good. Thank you for your very encouraging words. Greatly appreciated. 🙂 God bless you always, Rolain.

      1. rolerrol says:

        You welcome Kriz….! 🙂

  5. secretangel says:

    Awesome post. God can use anyone! God bless you!

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Thank you, Secretangel. 🙂 Glory to God alone. God bless you always. 🙂

  6. sf says:

    A great post! I too hide behind and pretty much only “speak” through my blog. In person, my mouth is almost zipped shut. Thanks for this post, which I think many bloggers can relate to.

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello sf. 🙂 Thank you for having some time to read this. Indeed, it is something many bloggers can relate to. Thank you again. 🙂 God bless you always.

  7. Andy Oldham says:

    I pray on your behalf that utterance may brig vent to you in the opening of your mouth, to make known with boldness the mysteries of the gospel fir which you are an embassador. Ephesians 6:18

    I love your post! Thanks for sharing your heart! God bless you! Write well my friend!

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello Andy. 🙂 Thank you for sharing that verse and reading this post. God bless you always.

  8. ncduhalde says:

    Karina- thank you for re-blogging this!

    Kriz- This is such an important post! Thank you for listening to His Spirit and writing so beautifully and boldly this important truth! I pray that you remain “hiding behind your blog” as you say if you are able to impart God’s truths so powerfully there and touch even one soul! You are where you are for A Reason- Divine indeed! Let God be glorified!

    Reading your article makes me think about people in the Bible like Moses who told God (as if to inform Him!;)- “I have a stuttering problem!…send someone else!” Of course God designated the job to Moses and it would be executed by no one else. Knowing there are wonderful examples in the Bible of how God uses ordinary, even sub-ordinary people to accomplish His Purposes on earth, I looked online and found this [edited]…check this out Kriz- you will love!—

    Do you feel like God couldn’t possibly use you? Remember:

    ~ Noah was a drunk

    ~ Jacob was a liar

    ~ Leah was ugly

    ~ Joseph was abused

    ~ Moses had a stuttering problem (Moses stuttered)

    ~ Gideon was afraid

    ~ Samson was a womanizer

    ~ Rahab was a prostitute

    ~ David was an adulterer and a murderer

    ~ Jonah ran from God

    ~ Peter denied Christ

    ~ The Samaritan woman was divorced (more than once)

    ~ Lazarus was dead!

    ***Unknown Author***

    God can use anyone!!!!!

    1 Cor 1:26-31 puts it beautifully!–

    “Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” – 1 Cor 1:26-31

    Thank you Kriz for using your gift of writing and your faith in God to impart such an important truth to others! May the Lord continue to bless your witness, which is indeed very bold and wonderful! God bless you! Nancy

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello Nancy. 🙂 Thank you very much for sharing those very wonderful words. I love the verses you gave in the end part. 🙂 And I’m glad you liked this post. Thank you again. 🙂 God bless you always.

  9. Elaine says:

    Karina, thank you for reblogging this post! What a blessing!
    Kris, thank you for this wonderful reminder that God can use us all! Reblogging this!

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello Elaine. 🙂 Thank you for reading and reblogging this. 🙂 Glory to God alone. God bless you always, Elaine. 🙂

  10. Elaine says:

    Reblogged this on Elaine's Random Thoughts and commented:
    Wonderful reminder that God can use all of us, despite the fact that many of us feel incompetent to do His work. Without always being aware, we can be an influence on another, just by the way we live and conduct ourselves! Let’s be a positive influence for our God who loves us all!

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Thank you very much, Elaine. 🙂 God bless you always. 🙂

  11. hitman5184 says:

    Reblogged this on Shooting the Breeze and commented:
    This is such an important thing for us all to remember. Be encouraged in knowing that we all, in some way or another, have the ability to make a powerful impact on someones life, even if we don’t realize it.

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Hello. 🙂 Thank you for reblogging this. 🙂 Greatly appreciated. God bless you always. 🙂

      1. hitman5184 says:

        You’re welcome! I thought that it was a very important point you shared. You never can tell when you are making an impact on someones life. Be blessed!

      2. KrizSummer says:

        Amen. 😉 Thank you so much. God bless you always. 🙂

  12. Very touching. Love it. Thanks Kris for sharing this wonderful story. Yes, you have touched lives, not just your cousin, but all who reads this will be touched by you. 🙂

    1. KrizSummer says:

      🙂 Wow. Glory to God alone. Thank you for dropping by. Greatly appreciated. God bless you always. 🙂

  13. Julie Garro says:

    What a wonderful post. Sometimes I also feel like I hide behind my writing. God made us all different, to affect our world in different ways. Thanks for sharing this post.

    1. KrizSummer says:

      Thank you Julie. Glory to God alone. God bless you always. 🙂

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